Managing a household while parenting can easily feel overwhelming, especially when navigating your family through a co-parenting lifestyle. It is natural to go through the bumps in the road when figuring out the best decisions for your kids but here are a few tips to help create a smooth transition into co-parenting. 

Communication is Key

You may have heard the saying “good communication is the bridge between confusion and clarity” (a quote by Nat Turner). Good communication is a key piece to the puzzle when setting a foundation to this next step in your children’s lives. When helping your children cope with divorce and the changes that come with it, it’s important to view your partner as a “business partner” and completely avoid using your children as messengers. Like the game telephone you might have played growing up, so much crucial information could get lost in the translation. Not only can it cause tension between you and your co-parent but it also puts the children in the middle of an adult situation that they should be left out of. 

When communicating with your co-parent it is important to leave emotion out of the dialogue as you would a business partner. This will give you both the space and mental capacity to truly make decisions for the best interest of your child/children and not make decisions out of emotion. 

Home is Where the Heart is 

Just like after a long day at work, there is nothing more relaxing than being home in a space you can truly unwind in. Although “home” might look different for you and your children, your new home together can easily become a sanctuary for your family to grow and make memories in. The financial changes from a two-income home to a one-income home can be an adjustment. When in the market for your new home, consider applying for an FHA loan. FHA loans have a lower credit qualification requirement, require less money down, and have higher seller concessions. 

When grounding roots in your new home, let your children help make your new home “yours”. Let them in on decisions in their room and living space, hang up photos of the memories you have made together and display a family calendar. This will give them a sense of ownership and help ease the transition to a new living space while simultaneously keeping your child in the loop of whose house they will be at on what days.  

Perspective Can Change Anything

A shift in perspective can change your entire experience. Being consistent in your co-parenting approach will encourage peace in your and your children’s lives and reduce stress for everyone involved. As a result, the transition from house to house will happen with ease. It is common for co-parents to hyper-focus on the smaller details of the other house, become in competition with the other parent, or even be emotionally reactive towards each other. By making a conscious effort to focus on your time with your kids, practice peace, and stay intentional when managing your interactions with the co-parent, time spent doing damage control can actually be put towards the time spent with your children. 

Although co-parenting is no easy task, it can be done successfully and looked back on as a positive experience. At the end of the day, the beautiful children you have together are worth the time and effort needed to live a happy and healthy life post-divorce.