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January 2018

Blue raising positive children graphic with white images of books leaning on each other
Beech Acres, Natural Strength Parenting™, Raising Positive Children

An Evening with Lea Waters: Raising Strong Children Recap

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On January 11th, Mayerson Academy, Beech Acres Parenting Center and Children, Inc. welcomed author Lea Waters to Cincinnati as part of the Raising Positive Children: Global Author Series. Dr. Waters is an Australian psychologist, academic, researcher, author, and speaker who specializes in positive education, parenting, and organizations. Her book, The Strength Switch (see our review here) details the benefits of focusing on and building your child’s strengths before focusing on their weaknesses. The event was a huge success that saw parents leaving with a new perspective on strength-based parenting. Don’t miss the next Raising Positive Children event, Raising Confident Children featuring Lousia Jewell, on February 15th. Louisa Jewell is a speaker, author, positive psychology expert and the founder of the Canadian Positive Psychology Association (www.cppa.ca). She has facilitated thousands of people towards greater flourishing both at work and in their personal lives. Get your tickets now! Mayerson Academy president Jillian Darwish welcomes Dr. Waters to Mayerson Academy. “You do need to work on your child’s weaknesses, there is no doubt about that. The absence of a weakness is not the same as the presence of a strength. If you start with strengths we are starting with them at their best.  -Dr. Lea Waters “When we are talking about strengths-based parenting we are talking about a style of parenting that seeks to connect our children with their unique talents and strengths.” -Dr. Lea Waters “We are hardwired to have strengths. Everyone has them. Everyone has the capacity for resilience. Your child is stronger than you think.”  -Dr. Lea Waters

Blurry image of children walking down a hallway with backpacks on
Cyberbullying, Human Trafficking, Online Safety, Parenting Tips, Sex Trafficking

National Human Trafficking Awareness Day

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Today is National Human Trafficking Awareness Day. National Human Trafficking Awareness Day is designated to bring awareness to the plague of Human Trafficking. According to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, nearly 25,000 runaways were reported in 2017. Of those, an estimated 1 in 7 were possible victims of child sex trafficking. This sobering statistic heightens the importance of being aware of the global problem of human trafficking. Be Aware As a busy parent, the possibility of having to deal with this issue is likely a low priority on your list of daily concerns. While the likelihood of your child becoming a victim is remote, it is important to be aware of the issue and look for signs of human trafficking in your community. The National Human Trafficking Hotline lists a number of “red flags” to look for in your community. These include: Common Work and Living Conditions: Person is not free to leave or come and go as he/she wishes Person is in the commercial sex industry and has a “manager” They owe a large debt and is unable to pay it off Poor Mental Health or Abnormal Behavior: Person appears fearful, anxious, depressed, submissive, tense, nervous or paranoid Person exhibits unusually fearful or anxious behavior after bringing up law enforcement They avoid eye contact Poor Physical Health: Person doesn’t have medical care and/or is denied medical services by employer Person appears malnourished or shows signs of repeated exposure to harmful chemicals They show signs of physical and/or sexual abuse, physical restraint, confinement, or torture Often, bizarre security measures inconsistent with the rest of the area exist in the work and/or living locations. Look for opaque or boarded-up windows,  bars on windows, barbed wire, security cameras, etc.. How to Protect Your Children Tell your child to always be aware of their surroundings, be wary of communicating with strangers, and always have their cell phones with them (and charged!) with family and emergency contacts programmed in. Helping your child develop and maintain a good self-esteem and healthy relationships, you reduce the risk that he or she will be targeted by traffickers. Nationwide Children’s Hospital offers some tips on their website including: Know what your kids are doing online. (check out our recent tips on online safety) Know who your kids are with and where they are hanging out. There are obvious situations, like being on the street late at night, but even places like the mall can be dangerous. Teach your children resiliency. Help your child build a strong self-esteem from an early age. Maintain open communication with your child. Be someone the teens in your life can talk with. Awareness and caution are key to recognizing, reducing, and preventing human and sex trafficking. If you have any questions or concerns about this topic visit the National Human Trafficking Hotline or the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children websites.

Headshot photo of a woman sitting with her arms folded on a table
Beech Acres, Parenting Tips, Parents, Raising Positive Children, Strengths

Don’t Miss Lea Waters: Raising Strong Children Tomorrow Night at Mayerson Academy!

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Don’t miss the first event in the Raising Positive Children: Global Author Series tomorrow night at Mayerson Academy! Mayerson Academy and its partners Beech Acres Parenting Center and Children, Inc. are pleased to bring luminaries in the field of positive psychology to our region to share the best in current, applied science for building positive parenting capacity. Raising Positive Children: Global Author Series begins tomorrow as Dr. Lea Waters presents Raising Strong Children January 11th from 6-8 at Mayerson Academy. Lea Waters Ph.D. is an Australian psychologist, academic, researcher, author, and speaker who specializes in positive education, parenting, and organizations. Lea is the 2017-2019 President of the International Positive Psychology Association and serves on the Council of Happiness and Education for the World Happiness Council. She lives in Melbourne, Australia, with her husband, son, and daughter. Get your tickets now!

White "The Strength Switch" book cover with various colors of playdough in the background
Beech Acres, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips, Parents, Strengths

Book Review: The Strength Switch, By Lea Waters; A Busy Mom’s Perspective

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Guest blogger, Nikki Zellen, Director of Marketing Book Review: The Strength Switch, by Dr. Lea Waters As a busy Mom working at Beech Acres Parenting Center (behind the scenes), I am fortunate that sometimes my ‘homework’ helps me with my own kids! I had the pleasure of reading Ms. Waters’ book in advance of her appearance in Cincinnati for Raising Strong Children, part one of the Raising Positive Children: Global Author Series on January 11th at Mayerson Academy. The Strength Switch is laid out in two parts: Laying the Foundation and Building Strengths. In reading the first half, I recognized many of the same academic studies that our social workers casually talk about in the hallways and reference in meetings. However, Ms. Waters breaks them down for parents to understand. The references to the science and studies help the reader develop a belief that this stuff works! Once you start to embrace the opportunity to flip the switch, Ms. Waters provides many activities for different ages to test with your family. My personal favorite was The Praise Puzzle chapter. Ms. Waters provides detailed examples and phrases of how to celebrate your child in a way that builds on their strengths. If your child brings homes a good grade, there are a variety of ways to respond (which I had never really thought about before), which she outlines: Generic Praise: “Good Job!” Process Praise: “You prepared for this test by spending extra time each night reviewing material.   And it worked!” (praising child’s strategy) or “You pulled up your score by a full grade! What do you think you did that helped you improve? (praising child’s improvement) Praise for Character: “Thanks for opening the door! You are a helpful person!” (will internalize moral strengths are within him) Her recommendation: Strength-based Praise, linking a strength with an action. “You’ve used your persistence [strength] to stick to the task of reviewing for this test every night last week [action], even when you were tired and wanted to play computer games.” “…strength-based praise encourages both achievement and good character by connecting kids with the positive forces they unleash through the combined power of their strengths and their actions.” – Lea Waters The book forces parents to stop and think about their word choices and the profound impact they have on our children. Ms. Waters summarizes the book best for us… “Attention on the negative helped us survive. Attention on the positive helps us thrive.”   And we all want our kids to thrive! My one wish, which may be all Moms’ wish, is for more time. The Strength Switch was a little dense to get through, but if you are lucky enough to be near a Beech Acres Parenting Center location… in one hour you will be able to get a taste of Natural Strength Parenting™ with a parenting coach. Our strengths-based approach to parenting is based on many of the same studies mentioned in the book. Set an intention to focus on your parenting this year by reading The Strength Switch and seeing Lea Waters live in Cincinnati on January 11th. Tickets are available here!

Photo of a young girl on a computer looking shocked with her hands over her mouth
Beech Acres, Parenting Tips

Remember, It Is Important To Monitor Your Child’s Online Activity

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Remember, it is important to monitor your children’s online activity and be prepared to talk to them about things they may see on the internet. With the proliferation of digital devices, easy access to the internet, and the popularity of social networks it can be difficult to remain engaged with your child’s online activities, especially for a busy parent. On New Year’s Eve, popular YouTube vlogger Logan Paul posted a video of an apparent suicide while filming with his crew in Japan’s Aokigahara forest. The video titled “We found a dead body in the Japanese Suicide Forest…” was pulled after one day amid a storm of outrage and concern. While the video did contain a disclaimer at the beginning and was not monetized, many found the video to be in poor taste and inappropriate for young potentially impressionable viewers. Paul has since removed the video and apologized. Paul has nearly 20 million followers on his various YouTube channels with over 2 billion views. Many of the 22-year-old’s followers are teenagers. YouTube’s influence on teenagers is vast. According to the National Cyber Security Alliance, 91% of teens between 13 and 17 reports using YouTube regularly and 57% report to having an online account of some type that their parents are not aware of. This means it is critical to be aware of what your kids are doing online. Here are some tips to help you monitor your child’s online activity and how to talk to your kids about things they encounter online. Establish Ground Rules According to the National Cyber Security Alliance’s 2017 survey Keeping Up with Generation App: NCSA Parent/Teen Online Safety Survey, “28% of teens report that their household has no rules about their use of devices”. Of those families that do have rules in place over 70% of teens feel that those rules are effective. Be open about your concerns about your child’s online activity and work with them to establish rules. These rules should extend beyond just not using their devices at dinnertime and should include fair consequences for not following them. Make sure your rules are fair, based on your family’s values, and are focused on your child’s well-being. Monitor Their Activity This one may get some pushback from your teens as an invasion of privacy. Be clear about your concerns. Make sure they understand the things you are looking for (inappropriate content, cyberbullying) and why you are concerned. Look for social media and messaging apps and understand how your child is using those apps. Look through their YouTube and browser history with them and discuss any concerns that may arise. Develop Their Strengths Use this as an opportunity to develop your child’s strengths. Social intelligence, honesty, and perspective are important when being an online citizen. Being aware of the motives of others can be difficult to determine over the internet. Make sure your child is nimble with their thinking when engaging people online. Being open and honest about what they are doing online can help open communication with you. Explain that they are likely to encounter things online that they may disagree with or are not in line with their own values. Being able to look at different perspectives can help them be safer. Talk To Them Rules and monitoring can only go so far. Make sure you are listening to your children and talking to them. Videos like Paul’s or many others they may encounter online can be disturbing and confusing. Be open about topics that may come up and assure your children you are there for them. Seek Help When Necessary https://staysafeonline.org has some great tips for helping your teens stay safe online. Beech Acres Parenting Center offers Parent Coaching to help you deal with various parenting challenges. And of course, suicide, as depicted in the Logan Paul video, is a major concern among teens. Help is available If you need to talk to someone, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

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