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Natural Strength Parenting™

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Anxiety, Back To School, Mental Health, Natural Strength Parenting™

How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health; Tips For Speaking With Your Child In Elementary School

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How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health 1 in 5 children lives with a serious, diagnosable mental illness. 1 in 5. Think about your child’s friends, their class, their school. That’s a lot of kids. It’s never been more important to be able to speak openly and honestly about mental health with your children. Fortunately, today’s parents are more open to discussing these important issues that previous generations. So, you’re open to discussing mental health with your child, but how do you do it? Where do you start? As with most essential topics, start at the beginning. Talk with your children about their feelings, focus on their strengths, and most importantly listen to what they have to say. Here are some tips from our parenting experts to get the conversation started with your child in elementary school. We also shared how to talk to your preschooler and we’ll help you keep the conversation going with tips on speaking to your child into junior high and high school. Elementary School By the time your child is in elementary school, their personalities are well established, they’ve probably made some strong friendships and they are full of emotions. Often, these emotions will come as unexpected outbursts that may catch you off guard! That’s OK. They are learning to express their feelings, and you can be there to guide them. Linking their feelings and how they express them to their strengths is key at this age to identify and build their unique strengths and build resiliency. What to say to your kids when they are in elementary school. Make a feelings thermometerhttps://copingskillsforkids.com/blog/2016/4/27/making-a-feelings-thermometer Kids at this age can understand things when they are presented to them visually. Giving them a way to express and understand how they are feeling visually can help them start to manage those emotions. Have your child interview others about their feelings and how they cope. Hopefully, while your child was younger, you helped them identify key adults (including yourself!) that they can talk to about their feelings. An interview with one of these trusted persons can help your child see that everyone deals with changing emotions and can give them insight into how others cope. Ask your child, “Is it okay to feel; sad, embarrassed, guilty, shame, happy, joy, lonely, anger?” Normalize their feelings. No matter what they are. Forget the notion that boys don’t cry and eliminate the concept of shame from your daughter’s vocabulary. All emotions are valid, and your child is going to feel ALL of the feels. Sometimes in the same day! Make sure they understand it is OK to not be OK all the time. And remind them that you are there for them. What does it feel like when you get nervous? Those butterflies in their stomach aren’t going to go anywhere anytime soon. As they get older, they may encounter more things that cause them to be nervous. New teachers, new school, new friends, new team, homework. Managing their nervousness and making sure it doesn’t explode into full-blown panic is a skill that they can continue to develop their entire lives. Who are three people are in can trust with your thoughts/ feelings? As they get older, your children may feel more comfortable discussing things with their friends. That’s fine, but make sure those relationships stay healthy and make sure to keep yourself in the loop. Narrowing down a circle of trusted people ensures them that they always have someone to talk to you. Talking with your children early, often, and continuously about their mental well-being is so essential. Share these tips with fellow parents and let us know which strategies worked best for your family. Check out our complete guide to talking to your child about mental health at any age. Learn more about discussing mental health with your preschooler. Learn more about discussing mental health with your child in elementary school. Learn more about discussing mental health with your teens and high schoolers. Looking to go further? Check out Natural Strength Parenting To Go! These text-based courses from our parenting experts help you get the most out of Natural Strength Parenting™ with easy to implement parenting strategies. Get started today!

Photo of a little girl reading with father on the couch
Anxiety, Back To School, Mental Health, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips, Parents

How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health; Tips For Talking To Your Preschooler

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How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health 1 in 5 children lives with a serious, diagnosable mental illness. 1 in 5. Think about your child’s friends, their class, their school. That’s a lot of kids. It’s never been more important to be able to speak openly and honestly about mental health with your children. Fortunately, today’s parents are more open to discussing these important issues that previous generations. So, you’re open to discussing mental health with your child, but how do you do it? Where do you start? As with most essential topics, start at the beginning. Talk with your children about their feelings, focus on their strengths, and most importantly listen to what they have to say. Here are some tips from our parenting experts to get the conversation started with your preschooler. We’ll also share how to keep the conversation going with tips on speaking to your child in elementary school and into junior high and high school. Preschool It’s never too early to begin talking to your child about mental health. For your younger children, keep it simple and speak in terms and contexts that they will be able to understand. Preschool-age children are likely not just going to tell you how they feel, but they may express their feelings in a variety of ways. Look for their clues and engage them when you see them expressing different emotions. Use these clues as an opportunity for you to help them understand their feelings as they are first experiencing them and help them navigate their reactions to those emotions. What to ask. And what to say to your preschooler. What causes you to have butterflies in your stomach? This feeling of anxiety or nervousness is an easy one for children to recognize as it manifests itself physically. Help them identify what causes these feelings and help them cope with it by facing their feelings head-on. Where do your feelings come from? Helping your children understand where their feelings come from, how and why they react to certain experiences and stimuli, can help them begin to work out what to do with those emotions. Who can you talk to if your feelings get to be too much? Let your children know that you are there for them always. But also teach them to establish trust with other key adults in their lives. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, teachers, mentors, close friends, and doctors and therapists should be recognized as trusted people that they can turn to discuss their feelings. What are some ways you can calm down/relax/feel better/control your feelings? However, you phrase it, making sure that your children understand basic coping techniques at an early age is important. It may be quiet time in their room, a certain song or playlist, drawing or coloring, or even snuggling with mom or dad. Once your children know they have a way to deal with their feelings, they are starting to build resilience. Use media and daily experiences to normalize conversations about reacting to specific emotions. After watching a movie, TV show, or YouTube video together discuss how the characters interacted with each other and dealt with their feelings. Talking with your children early, often, and continuously about their mental well-being is so essential. Share these tips with fellow parents and let us know which strategies worked best for your family. Check out our complete guide to talking to your child about mental health at any age. Learn more about discussing mental health with your preschooler. Learn more about discussing mental health with your child in elementary school. Learn more about discussing mental health with your teens and high schoolers. Looking to go further? Check out Natural Strength Parenting To Go! These text-based courses from our parenting experts help you get the most out of Natural Strength Parenting™ with easy-to-implement parenting strategies. Get started today!

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middle child, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips, Parents, Raising Positive Children

Stuck In The Middle; Parenting Tips for Raising Your Middle Child

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“I’m losing my mind just a little So why don’t you just meet me in the middle?” Maren Morris, “The Middle” We’re not sure if Maren Morris is a middle child or not, but for middle children everywhere just hearing the word “middle” can cause you to shudder. You probably heard the hit song “The Middle” more often than a middle child heard themselves called by their proper names during the course of their entire childhood. Being called by their sibling’s name. Being the “forgotten” child. Becoming the de facto “negotiator” in the family. Hand me down jeans and tag-along hobbies. The stereotypes of “middle child syndrome” are as well-known and accurate, and often inaccurate, as any other stereotype. “Marcia, Marcia, Marcia” Jan Brady, The Brady Bunch Nowhere else in pop-culture has the middle child stereotype been more grossly overstated and exaggerated than in Jan Brady, the classic middle child from the 70’s hit sitcom The Brady Bunch. Not only was Jan stuck in-between her younger sister Cindy and older sister Marcia, but she was also placed in a fantastical and unique fictional family dynamic; dead father, blended family featuring another trio of siblings, unrealistic expectations to live up to the popularity and success of her older sister…the famous expression of her exacerbation “Marcia, Marcia, Marcia” is seared into our collective consciousness. That feeling of not being able to live up to her sister and feeling trapped and forgotten in the middle certainly doesn’t have to be the destiny of any middle child. Let’s break some of these stereotypes by focusing on your middle child’s strengths. “Live right now, just be yourself. It doesn’t matter if it’s good enough, for someone else. It just takes some time, little girl your in the middle of the ride, everything, everything will be just fine. Everything, everything will be all right.” Jimmy Eat World, “The Middle” Another hit song called “The Middle”, this one by Jimmy Eat World, encourages everyone to be themselves and to be their best. Whether we’re talking about your first child, middle child, or sixth child, all of your children have their own unique strengths. One way to make sure all of your children feel special is to take the VIA Survey of Character strengths (link) and share everyone’s top strengths. This will show all of your children, that they are unique, special and have different strengths that set them apart. Three sibling dynamics are tough. Try to avoid two-person centric tasks and activities. Those types of situations are likely to make one child feel left out. It can be hard to have three peers together because typically two feel more unity than the one. It’s a ‘numbers game’ and three is one of the most difficult to manage. It’s the same with friendships. Remember the last time your kid had more than one friend over for a sleepover? How quickly did that end in tears? Active listening is important with all of your children, being present and in the moment when you are having a conversation lets them know you are truly engaged and listening to them, but it can be critically important to your middle child, especially if they are already vulnerable to feeling left out or forgotten. Put your phone down, get comfortable, be engaged and listen to what your child is saying. “Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.”Stealers Wheel, “Stuck in the Middle With You” The middle child often feels “on their own” because a big family is a busy family. Their older sibling probably already has activities that they are actively involved in and the younger sibling may require more work and attention. This can cause a feeling of isolation for the middle child. They feel “stuck” between their older sister’s constant soccer practices and their younger brother’s constant tantrums. This may cause them to desire more attention and even act out to obtain it. Remember their strengths and point them out. “Thank you for using your strength of self-regulation sitting quietly and doing your homework during your sister’s game. I know it was a long game, she appreciates your support!” or “Thank you for using your humor to help calm your brother down. I know he can be a handful sometimes, but he loves when you make him laugh.” Pointing out their strengths and including them in situations reminds them that they are an important part of the family. Set aside time for your children to play together. Find something they all like or have them take turns choosing a board game, or other fun activity to do together. On a rainy day, encourage them to practice some mindfulness by doing some yoga or even just a quick breathing exercise. Your smartphone or smartwatch may have something to guide them through this. (Added benefit you get some peace and quiet, if only for a few minutes) And, if they choose a game that involves more than three players, jump in and play with them! “I think I’m a little bit caught in the middle Gotta keep going or they’ll call me a quitter” Paramore, “Caught in the Middle”  It is important that your middle child does not feel unnecessary pressure to live up to inflated expectations. One child may excel at sports, while another succeeds in the classroom. Help them find what they are good at and encourage them to be their best. They may even reject what their older siblings are into. And that’s fine. Encourage them to try different things, and they will find what suits them. Parenting a middle child may be more difficult or even easier than parenting your first or your last, but in reality, the same principles apply. Love them. Focus on their strengths. And be intentional, fully present, and completely engaged with them.

White Back to School Quick Tips BAPC graphic with a backpack on it
Back To School, Beech Acres, character strengths, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips, Parents, Schools

Back To School Quick Tips!

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Back to School Quick Tips Try a few of these tips at home to help your family successfully transition back to your school year routine. Let us know which ones worked for you! State An Intention Start by setting an intention with your child for the new school year. Ask, “what can you do to make this year your best yet?” Get curious with them and ask “What do you need from me to succeed?” Then make sure to build in accountability. “What steps will you take to succeed?” “How will you know if the intention you set is working? How will your experience at school be better?” Build On Thier Strengths Acknowledge your child’s fear and anxiety, and offer the idea that these feelings subside as you become familiar with what was once ‘new’. Every person has 24 character strengths inside them. You can discover your family’s strengths for free by taking the VIA Character Strengths Survey located on our website. Take A Mindful Moment Actively listen to their concerns and let them know you are listening. “I hear that you are worried about your first day of school, but you smiled when you talked about seeing your friends again.” Take Time For Yourself Set an intention for yourself to be prepared and ready to help your kids succeed! Lean into your own strengths of Love, Fairness, Judgment, Leadership, and Perseverance. Take a moment for yourself. Sit outside and take a moment to Appreciate the Beauty of these final summer days.

Photo of a father having a deep discussion with his son
Beech Acres, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips, Parents, the talk

Being Intentional About Having “The Talk”

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Being Intentional About “The Talk” Having “the talk” with your child can be a stressful mile marker on your parenting journey. These discussions can be as anxiety provoking for you as a parent as they are for your child. Don’t stress out! Be intentional about having this important conversation with your child while being mindful of their feelings on the subject. Phasing these topics into your regular conversations with your children and carefully planning out these discussions work really well for most parents. When Is The Right Time To Have “The Talk”?  As with most parenting milestones, the answer really is, there is no perfect time. It really is up to your child and up to you as a family to determine when the time is right. Parents can watch for clues and listen to the types of questions their kids are asking to determine when the time is right to start having these important conversations. It is helpful to begin these conversations as early as it makes sense for your family. It’s never too early to begin having these conversations with your child. Many parents begin discussions around gender differences and privacy as early as potty training or when their child begins recognizing their own body parts. Feel free to use your strength of social intelligence to consider other factors in their environment that may impact your need to have these discussions. For instance, what are other kids talking about, did something come up on a TV show or movie that prompted questions from your kids, do they interact with older children on the bus, in sports or in other social situations where they may need to understand things they may hear? These are all things that could impact the timing of the talk. If the topic doesn’t come up sooner, a good time to begin these conversations may be when schools begin education around body changes. This is a good time to start having your own discussions to clarify the information you are receiving and to answer their questions at home in a more comfortable environment.  Using the school’s discussions is a “door opener” for you to begin the talk. How To Start The Conversation  Many parents find it easy to start the conversation around changes in the body. Sudden growth, the appearance of body hair, the need for deodorant, or the need or desire to begin shaving are obvious physical cues that it’s time to have the talk. Your children may also begin exhibiting an interest in their appearance. All of these behaviors are natural and important opportunities to initiate the talk since speaking with your children about their bodies may help address, diffuse and comfort any anxiety and awkwardness they may be feeling about growing up. Remember though, these are important issues to discuss with your child on an ongoing basis. The focus of your discussions may change as they grow up, but it is important to keep these conversations going. Who Should Have The Talk?  Should mom have the talk with your daughter? Dad to son? Rock, paper, scissors? The best case scenario is that this is a team effort involving both parents presenting a united front. It is important to be very clear that you both are open and comfortable in having this conversation. Parents, this will likely take some pre-pep talking and self-management to make sure your kids are not “weirded out” by you and the topic.  This will go a long way in establishing trust so your kids feel comfortable approaching you with questions and concerns in the future.  Many of us want to create a space where your kids to come to you with these questions rather than turning to their friends, an older sibling, or the internet. If it’s just you, or if your child is much more comfortable speaking to just mom or dad, it’s okay to respect the one-on-one conversation, but important to make sure you are on the same page with what is being shared. They’re Going to Have Questions Aren’t They? Yep! Kids will lean into their strength of curiosity or love of learning. But, they may not ask them right away. That is what it is important to be open and non-judgmental. When they do have questions, let your kids take the lead. Your brain may go all the way to the end of this discussion (i.e. too far), but they may have important questions along the way that you need to answer intentionally. Your kids need you to respond clearly to the questions they have in a meaningful way. Double check with them to make sure they received the answer they were looking for. “The talk” really is about more than just about biology or the act of intimacy. It is really about healthy relationships and helping your child understand how to develop and maintain them in the future. The sooner you begin these conversations, the better. Children these days have so much access to information whether it be from their friends, the internet, or from anywhere that may not share your family’s values. Don’t worry though; with an intentional approach that is mindful of your child’s feelings, you’ll get through this and be on to the next parenting milestone!

Photo of a father hugging his son from the side with his hand on his head
Natural Strength Parenting™, Parent Connext™

One Dad’s Parent Connext™ Story

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Ben was a dad struggling with negativity following his recent divorce when he saw a Parent Connext™ flyer in his child’s pediatrician’s office. He was carrying with him a tremendous amount of anger, bitterness, and resentment. These emotions were having a negative impact on his relationship with his son. Divorce is one of the more common ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) that can have a significant impact on a child’s development. Meaningful cooperation between parents during a divorce is critical to mitigating the negative effects a child feels. But this can be difficult when there is ongoing turmoil between the parents. Ben was concerned with the negative messaging he believed his son was receiving from their mother about him. He was focused all of his energy on her, rather than on developing a solid relationship with his child. But Ben had a powerful motivation, a true desire to be a good father to his son. Ben engaged the Beech Acres Parenting Center Parenting Specialist through Parent Connext™ located in his pediatrician’s office. “Ben came in because he wanted to improve his parenting,” Mary, Ben’s Parent Connext™ Parenting Specialist, commented. “We focused on building his relationship with his son.” In the beginning, it was still difficult for Ben to set aside the bitterness and negativity, but soon he began to make progress.  Mary introduced Ben to Natural Strength Parenting™, Beech Acres Parenting Center’s unique strengths-based approach to parenting, through a variety of fun, easy to use tools that focused on intentionality, strengths, and mindfulness. Mary asked powerful questions to encourage Ben to open up to her in an authentic way. This helped him to focus on the positive outcome of building a strong relationship with his child. When Ben would speak about his son Mary used expansive listening, listening fully and engaging with what Ben was saying. This enabled true collaboration between the two on solutions for parenting strategies. Through effective use of Natural Strength Parenting™ Mary and Ben were able to focus on his kid and on a plan for the future. “His long-term goal is to have a healthy relationship with his child,” Mary said. Ben was empowered to be a good father. “That mindfulness stuff you taught me really works,” Ben told Mary after several sessions. “Ben had a ‘lightbulb’ moment,” Mary said. “He stated his intention to be 100% present and engaged when he was with his son.” Ben is focused on building long-lasting, positive relationships with his child. By being intentional, mindful, and focusing on his families’ strengths Ben is improving himself and his son. *Names and circumstances may be altered to protect the identity of our client

Jim Mason, Mental Health, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parent Connext™, Parents, Strengths

Parents Embracing Children’s Mental Health, Beech Acres Study Indicates

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A new, national Children’s Mental Health Awareness Study from Beech Acres Parenting Center offers insights into the evolving perceptions and practices of parents regarding the mental health of their children. The study shows that acceptance of mental health as a key factor of overall health is becoming increasingly mainstream among parents. Among the most compelling results of the study is the dramatic generational change in parents’ view of mental health. While 61% of parents said they had no discussion of mental health when they were kids, only 13% of them do not discuss it now as parents. “Many children and families live with mental health concerns or even a mental illness, so it’s extremely encouraging that we are bringing down the veil of stigma for parents on this topic,” said Jim Mason, President, and CEO of Beech Acres Parenting Center. “Parents who are actively engaged with their children’s mental health and well-being can have a huge positive impact, and we’ve seen that to be true over many generations at Beech Acres.” Hope for Parents This changing attitude toward mental health is further reflected by a finding from the study that 91% of parents who have not had to seek treatment for their child would expect to be involved in their child’s mental health treatment, instead of taking a hands-off approach. Even before seeking treatment, 41% of parents in the study said they actively work to support their children’s mental health on a regular basis. Parents are interested in hearing about mental health proactively from sources they trust. About 2/3 of parents who participated in the study think mental health resources should be proactively shared by a child’s school. The same number of parents would like to receive mental health resources from their pediatrician during a well-child visit. “Proactively addressing children’s mental health in a setting in which other needs are already being met has been a successful strategy of ours for several years now through our Parent Connext™ program,” Mason said. “It’s encouraging that parents are validating this approach.” Parent Connext™ meets parents where they are by placing parenting specialists onsite in pediatric care practices. By providing prompt, practical support, we help build parents’ capacity to provide safe and nurturing environments for their children. Mental Health Education As more people realize the importance of mental health, education is increasingly necessary to set aside misconceptions about it. “There is no substitute for personalized care from a mental health professional to help your family address mental health questions,” Mason said. “Misperceptions about mental health stop some families from accessing the best possible care for their children. By educating and supporting parents, Beech Acres reduces fears and increases parents’ confidence in providing their children with whatever mental health care they may need.” The study also discovered other areas of mental health that need clarification. For example, the top three concerns of parents who have never had to seek treatment for their children are Not understanding their child’s condition (42%), Fear of the unknown (42%) and Not knowing where to go for help (38%). Solutions In many cases, the answers to mental health treatment questions may be more attainable than we realize. The study indicated that eight in 10 parents believe there is a strong or moderate connection between building on a child’s strengths and improving their mental health. At Beech Acres, building on a child’s innate strengths is a pillar for its Natural Strength Parenting™ framework. Natural Strength Parenting™ is a distinct approach to parenting that integrates concepts of intentionality and mindfulness to help parents better see and encourage their children’s unique, innate strengths. Beech Acres Parenting Center is the first organization anywhere to recognize the power of combining intentionality, mindfulness, and strengths into one foundational approach to parenting. Sharon James, Senior Parent Educator at Beech Acres Parenting Center, said the Natural Strength Parenting™ approach can give parents easy steps to support their children’s mental health. “For example, listen to them with curiosity to spot a strength they have, and make a point to promote that strength to build their confidence and self-esteem,” James said. “This kind of intentional act of support can make a huge, positive impact in the lives of children.” Methodology Information from the Children’s Mental Health Awareness Study is based on a 2018 survey of 798 parents nationwide who have children aged 18 and under that lived with them in their homes.

Photo of an anxious child having a meltdown
Anxiety, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips

Calming An Anxious Child

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Nearly all children feel anxious at times, whether it’s imagining a monster under the bed, worrying about their first day of a new school year or feeling uncertain about how to manage a situation with a friend. In an attempt to help, you may tell your child they have nothing to be afraid of or find that other suggestions you offer are not helping. It’s natural that out of love you want to shield your child from things that make them worried. And since we cannot always control what is going on in their world (they will move from one grade to the next for example), the best way to help is to discover ways with your child for them to manage their reaction to those uncomfortable situations. It is always a good idea for parents to check in with their Pediatrician and here are some ideas that may also help: Show empathy and offer reassurance. Let them know that you don’t like those feelings either and are so sorry they are experiencing them. Offer the reassurance that most people experience scary feelings and that there are a lot of different ways to feel better. “When I am worried, I like to color (walk, etc) and it really helps me feel calm. What would you like to try?” Do a mindful ‘body scan’ with them. Our thoughts can oftentimes increase worrying so move from head (thoughts) to body (physical) with questions like “Where in your body do you feel scared?” or “What part of your body feels calm?” Together, visualize moving the scary feelings out of the body through fingers or toes. Do deep breathing. Deep breathing brings oxygen to all parts of the body and calm, gentle breathing can settle an anxious child more than words. Your child can use their fingers to represent candles as they slowly breathe in and out. “Let’s gently blow out 5 ‘candles’ together”. Focus on their strengths. Think of a time that they managed a situation that was unfamiliar or scary. “Do you remember when you felt worried about going to the sleepover but you ended up really having fun?” Ask them if they can share what they did to help themselves with those feelings. For younger children, suggest reading “Visiting Feelings” by Lauren Rubenstein. With beautiful illustrations and descriptive prose, it allows children to explore and befriend their emotions with acceptance. The movie “Inside Out” offers a unique perspective on how big emotions show up and ways to better understand them. For teens, ‘The Anxiety Workbook for Teens’ by Lisa Schab has a lot of different activities for older children to try. Use metaphors to help children understand how feelings can be big and small and how they come and go. A parent might offer a metaphor: “Feelings come and go like waves” and explore with them how their feelings come in waves: Big, small and then go away. You can use something more tangible such as toy cars. “Your cars go up and down on their tracks and on bridges. Feelings are like that, too”. Get playfully curious with them and ask how they imagine their feelings. One child made paper wings and showed how her scary feelings flew around the room all around her. And then asked mom to buy a butterfly net so that she could catch them. Celebrate their success in any attempt to master their anxiousness. “I know those are not fun feelings but you are very brave for working so hard to make your worried feelings go away”. It is important to empower children to deal with uncomfortable feelings by equipping them with the tools to manage them. When they discover their own solutions with your support, their confidence soars. And this is one tool they can use their entire lives!

Photo of an anxious child having a meltdown
Anxiety, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips

Anxious About Anxiety?

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anx·i·e·ty /aNGˈzīədē/ noun a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome the desire to do something, typically accompanied by unease. In Psychiatry a nervous disorder characterized by a state of excessive uneasiness and apprehension, typically with compulsive behavior or panic attacks. Anxiety is a common feeling that can cause fear, stress, and worry. Nearly all children feel anxious at times, whether it’s imagining a monster under the bed, worrying about their first day of a new school year or feeling uncertain about how to manage a situation with a friend. This month we’re focusing on anxiety and how you can help your child manage this complex issue. We’ll share tips from our parenting experts and feature fun activities you can do with your child to help ease their feelings of anxiousness. All of our solutions are based on Natural Strength Parenting™, our unique strength-based approach to parenting that incorporates mindfulness and intentionality. Bookmark our blog and follow us on Facebook or Twitter so you don’t miss any of our tips.    

Photo of parents and their two children sitting on a sofa
Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips, Parents

Discussing Job Loss, Unemployment or Disruption in Employment With Your Children

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A parent’s job loss or any significant change or disruption to your employment status can be difficult on the entire family. Especially your children. Your children know when something’s wrong. They are sensitive to changes at home, and it can be stressful for them. If you’re a parent facing an employment gap or disruption, here are some tips to talk to your kids about the situation. First, take some time to collect your thoughts and manage your own emotions about the change in your employment status; especially If the disruption was sudden or unexpected. These changes can be stressful and your children will certainly pick up on your emotions. Take a mindful moment to calm your mind before talking with them. A simple breathing exercise, a quick walk around the block, or a moment to write down some of your thoughts can help you clear your head and organize your thoughts all while utilizing your strengths of love and perspective. When you do talk to your children, be honest with them about the situation. Let them know about the change as soon as you can and answer any questions they may have. Allow them to guide the conversation. Ask them what it is they would like to know about the situation. They will be curious about the situation and may have questions you cannot answer or may not be ready to. Keep your answers age appropriate and lean into your family’s values. Try and keep the conversation brief, but meaningful and be sure to note their reactions. Set an intention to follow up again in a few days. Explain how the situation may affect the family. A change in employment will be accompanied by changes in your family’s routine. You’ll quickly discover that these changes can be stressful for your children and for you! Explain that you may be home more often, but will be busy seeking new opportunities and may need to shift your schedule with little notice to network or go to an interview. Discuss possible lifestyle changes as well. This is an opportunity to develop your family’s strength of perseverance. A night out at the movies may become a night at home watching an old favorite DVD or Blu-Ray. Dinner out may turn into your kids helping prepare their favorite meals at home.  If your children are old enough you can teach them about the strength of prudence by discussing finances and the economic struggles that may accompany a prolonged period of unemployment. Go, Team! Now that you have your family together and are talking about this situation, what’s next? Develop a plan for moving forward. Maybe Dad never had the chance to drive the kids to school, or Mom missed one too many games or dance recitals because she was working late. Plan a new routine around your new situation. Use your strength of creativity to maximize any extra time you have together as a family. Involving your children in the plans will help them feel connected and may mitigate some of the stress they are feeling. Focus on their strengths of curiosity and love of learning by allowing them to take the lead on planning fun family activities. Take this time to imagine what the rest of this year could look like if you genuinely connect with your family by focusing on everyone’s strengths, taking time for mindfulness and being more intentional with the time you have together. Parent Strong. Parent Mindfully. Parent Purposefully. A period of unemployment can be a tough time for your family. Now more than ever, it is important to focus on your family’s strengths, be intentional with your parenting, and take time for mindfulness. Beech Acres Parenting Center offers Natural Strength Parenting™ Coaching which can help you navigate this and many other parenting challenges. Your first session is free. Use this session to help you develop strategies for discussing this or other parenting challenges with your kids. 

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