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Anxiety

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Anxiety, Beyond The Classroom

Building Confidence and Identifying Strengths: A Beyond The Classroom Success Story

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Samantha*, a sophomore in high school, was experiencing test-related anxiety at school. This had a negative impact on her academic performance. Her anxiety spread to her personal life, where she began feeling anxious in social situations. For example, she had trouble even ordering her own meal in a restaurant.  To help her address these challenges, Samantha was referred to a Beech Acres Parenting Center therapist right in her school. Her therapist was able to begin uncovering the root causes of her anxiety. They worked together on building her confidence by identifying her strengths. Olivia, Samantha’s therapist, took time to build a genuine connection with Samantha. This was key to helping Samantha be able to identify her struggles and be open about them in a safe space. Once her underlying issues were identified, they were able to begin healing.  Samantha recently completed exam week without feeling so anxious. She could call upon mindfulness techniques she learned in therapy to calm herself down. She’s even feeling more confident and comfortable in social situations as well.  Olivia worked with Samantha’s parents as well to help them be prepared to face challenges as they came up. They now know when to give Samantha space and when to give her support. Samantha and her family are now on a path to success.  Many students require additional help, from mental health needs to resources at home that go beyond the classroom. Beyond the Classroom™ enhances readiness to learn by improving the emotional and behavioral wellness of the students. Additional support is available for parents that build resilience, improves economic stability, and empowers them to become an advocate. Learn more about this innovative approach to mental health support. *Names and circumstances may have been changed to protect the privacy of these families. 

Photo of a young boy wincing as a nurse gives him a shot
Anxiety, Parent Connext™

Intentionally Preparing Your Child for Shots at the Doctor’s Office

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Going to the doctor can be stressful for your children. Especially when a scheduled or seasonal shot is part of the visit! Here are some tips to make your visit go a little easier. Prepare your child: Let your child know before you go what the plan is. Most parents are afraid if they share with their child about the shot, the child will have a meltdown and not go. Keep in mind, it is better for the child to go through normal emotions at home instead of in the office where the pressure is high. Calmly explain what will happen and what options your child has (do you want to watch or look away, would you like to sit on my lap or on the table, do you want them to count or just do it). Show what will happen with a stuffed animal or doll at home. If you have alcohol wipes, a syringe, and a band-aid, you can walk your child through the steps and let him play it out as well. Explain that first the nurse will clean the area and it might feel a little cool, then the nurse will give the shot, then when you get the band-aid it’s all done. Clean, shot, band-aid, done! Ask your child what will help him during the shot (see questions above), then talk about what you will do after the appointment (get a sticker, go to the park, etc). Empathize with your child and let her know you wish it was a choice to get the shot, but it’s important to get the shot to help keep us healthy. It is a choice how you get shot and provide choices for after the appointment. This can be as simple as picking out a sticker at the office, going to the park, or doing something else your child might enjoy if possible. If you can’t do something right after the appointment, let your child know when it will happen, like after work/school. Stay calm: You may be nervous or anxious yourself, especially if you have had a negative experience for yourself or with your child. Try mindfulness or this STOP activity to work on calming yourself first. Children are a thermometer and can feed off their adult caregiver’s stress. Staying calm can help your child stay calm. Practice breathing with your child as well.  For older kids, you can work on strategies at home that will help with anxiety and fear. Would he like to squeeze a stress ball (or your hand) during, does he want to watch, would he like to listen to music. Practice mindful breathing (see STOP activity) and talk about how it can help calm the body so it makes the shot easier. You can also put a cold pack on the other arm or leg at the same time as the shot. The brain can’t process pain and cold at the same time, so it can help alleviate some of the fear of the pain. Some offices may have the buzzy to try as well: Tell her it’s her job to let you know how it felt when it is over and if the cold pack helped. Comfort positioning: Depending on the age of the child, you can advocate for a comfortable position during the shot. For infants, you can swaddle with just the leg out, which can be calming, or breastfeed, feed, or give the pacifier during the shot. For toddlers/preschool age, you can have the child sit on your lap facing you and hug her to help keep her still. If your medical practice does not like the child sitting on an adult’s lap, you can get on the table and sit behind your child with her legs on the table and cross her arms in front of her while gently hugging. Remind her of her choices (which leg/arm, if she wants to watch or look away, and if she wants the nurse to count or not). Remind her it’s clean, poke, band-aid then all done, then discuss what you are doing after (get a sticker, go get a treat, etc).  Distraction: Some kids benefit from distraction during the procedure, you can bring bubbles and ask if she wants to blow them (helps with breathing) or have you blow them, or bring a stuffed animal that can get the shot first that she can then hug and talk to during. You can also show a video or sing a song. Some offices may have the buzzy that helps block sharp pain and provides a distraction that you can request. Play: Let the child play it out when you get home. Give your child the opportunity to play with the medical supplies when he gets home after your appointment. The play helps him work through getting the shot and provides a sense of control over a situation he had no control over.

Photo of a mother and son walking down the street by a Vote Today sign
Anxiety

How to Talk to Your Kids About the Elections

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Guest Blogger: Shawn Gilligan Parent Connext™ Parenting Specialist Election season is upon us.  It’s hard to miss it with all the political billboards, yard signs, tv ads, radio spots, mailers, etc.  No matter your political affiliation or the age of your kids, they are noticing the changes in the landscape, hearing the messages on the various media outlets, and listening to our conversations.   So, how do you talk to your kids about the upcoming election? The first step is knowing your kid(s) and their ability to understand concepts and abstract information, much of that depends on the age of your kids.  Kids as young as 3 years old have some understanding of us and them and are developing their strength of fairness and sense of justice.  As they enter elementary school kids understand concrete information but, are unable to grasp abstract concepts.  They still tend to be very black and white in their thinking—good or bad, right or wrong, fair or unfair.  Additionally, there is much variability in the knowledge and the ability to process the information in school-age children.  Middle school-age children are gaining the ability to think more abstractly.  They can think about possibilities and have an understanding of different points of view.  High schoolers use complex thinking, have increased thoughts about global concepts, justice, politics, patriotism, etc. and often develop idealistic views on topics or concepts, and may debate or develop an intolerance for opposing views.  So, back to that question…how do you talk to your kids about the election?  The following are some tips: Use your strength of curiosity. Start by asking questions, that can be a great guide for how much information your child needs or wants.  Questions like:  What have you heard about the election?  What are you wondering about the election?  What are your thoughts on the upcoming election?  Talk about values. If you haven’t already, this is a great time to define your family values.  This is an opportunity to talk about what is important to you as a family and as an individual.  Help your kids understand what you believe at home and how that impacts your vote.   Differentiate between people and the offices they hold.  Let your kids know we can disagree with or not like an elected official be we can still respect the office and position held.   Help your children feel secure.  Kids need to feel safe and the adults are in control.  We need to reassure our kids, despite our personal concerns or fears.  Let them know we have a strong democracy, there is a system in place and it is set up in a way that many people are making decisions (checks and balances). As always, be mindful. Be deliberate and mindful about how you talk about the election without letting it turn to gossip, name-calling, or false information.  If you disagree with something let your kids know, this is not our family value, and here is why.  Be a role model, remember, our kids are watching and learning from us when we are talking to family members, friends, and others.  Check your own verbal messages and nonverbal messages…are they positive or negative?  Are you fact-checking before repeating information?   Tackling ‘fake’ news.  Teach your kids they do not need to believe everything they hear.  Teach them to fact check and check on reliable sources of information.  Work on their critical thinking skills.  Teach them about political advertising and what they are trying to do.  Talk about who paid for the ads and how they are trying to influence the voter.  Discuss political strategies—appealing to emotions, eliciting fear, smoke screens and distractions, and coded language to rally their supporters.  Media Center Specialists in your students’ schools may already be teaching them about sources of news. Talk to your kids about the principle of free speech.  It’s difficult for kids to understand and differentiate when we tell them to be kind and respectful and yet they see politicians and us (see #5, be a role model) being rude and disrespectful.  Let them know that free speech is a constitutional right, yet it is still not okay for anyone—politicians, famous people, adults, kids to engage in name calling and bullying.   Talk about good ideas and bad ideas not good people and bad people.  Help them recognize having differences of opinion doesn’t make people good or bad.  Having differences doesn’t mean you have to be enemies.  Ask if your kids can come up with some real-life examples.  They can have different opinions and still be friends…agree to disagree.   Using empathy.  When talking about issues try to see both points of view and encourage your kids to do so as well.  Teach them to be fair in seeing the other perspective by truly listening to the other point of view and gaining understanding rather than thinking of your counter argument.   Role play.  Empower your kids to handle situations they may encounter with other kids or family member who may have strong or differing political opinions.  Come up with some scenarios they may experience and make a plan for how they can handle these situations.  Empower them to stand their ground for what they believe in and fight for it while being understanding and respectful.  Also, giving them the power to walk away if the other person is not respectful, bullying, or name calling.   Kids of all ages can participate in learning about democracy in many ways.  You can take kids of all ages with you to vote or if voting by mail let them look at the ballot and talk to them about your votes.  Often at school there are mock elections or let them run for president at this non-profit site. You can also create democracy in action at home, voting on what game for family game night or voting on the family movie, etc. As election day nears, please exercise your civic duty and VOTE!

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Anxiety, COVID-19, Parenting Tips, Parents

Reassuring Your Children About The Coronavirus. Tips from Dr. Christopher Bolling

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Reassuring Your Children About The Coronavirus. Tips from Dr. Christopher Bolling Reassuring your kids during times of uncertainty is very important for your family’s well-being. As news of the coronavirus and its related respiratory disease COVID-19 continues to spread, Beech Acres Parenting Center board member and Pediatrician at Pediatric Associates of Northern Kentucky, Dr. Christopher F. Bolling has some tips to help parents navigate this developing scenario with your children. Tips From a Pediatrician Today the coronavirus/COVID 19 was declared a pandemic by the World Health Organization (WHO), and the city of Cincinnati declared a state of emergency. This news and these terms can be scary. Remember though, “pandemic” is just a term that allows governments and other agencies to talk about the developing situation around the globe. It enables them to say, ‘this is something we need to deal with, together, as a planet’. They declare it a pandemic to mobilize people to understand that this is something we need to control. Control Measures Work There is good evidence that control measures work. What happens when you implement control measures is that you slow the spread of the virus and allow health care professionals to take care of the sick. The goal is not to overwhelm the health care system so they can adapt and take care of sick people. Control measures help the health care system cope with the situation more effectively. Talk To Your Kids As with any serious conversation, you need to have with your children, whether it be death, serious illness, or a term like ‘pandemic,’ let your kids lead the conversation. Answer their questions fully. Be responsive and sensitive to what they are asking you. They may have questions or concerns such as; ‘Is it dangerous?’ Tell them, yes, it can be scary, especially for older people, but for kids, it’s not as scary. ‘I’m worried about grandma getting sick.” Let them know there are things we can do to protect the people we care about, like washing our hands, staying away from others if we are sick, and checking in on them via FaceTime or Skype to make sure they are OK. Give your children concrete things they can do. Parse the information out in easy to digest pieces, so it’s easier for them to understand. Let them guide you. Pause the conversation if they shut down on you as too much information can be overwhelming. While COVID-19 appears to be the most severe for the elderly it is still very important to take precautions with your children . Kids’ resistance does, however, make control more difficult because they may be asymptomatic and able to transmit the illness without any outward signs of illness.  So, it is even more critical that they are following preventive measures like hand washing, social distancing, and staying home when they are sick. Stay Connected With Your Doctor, Practice Preventative Measures, and Stay Informed In the coming days and weeks, stay in close contact with your doctor’s office, and see what recommendations they may have. Visit their website, read any emails or other communications they share, and talk to their nurses. Things may be a little different than what you are used to at your doctor’s or pediatrician’s office, so pay close attention to how your practice is directing you. Every office will be different. Standard protections should continue in effect; again, hand washing, staying home when you’re sick, and limiting visits to the sick or elderly. During this time, you should pay special attention to any respiratory symptoms such as coughing or shortness of breath. If you have those symptoms, please call your doctor. Finally, the most important thing is to pay attention to local authorities and medical professionals about exposure. If they say stay home, stay home. These decisions are based on information from public health experts in your community and have everyone’s best interests in mind. Practice good infection control measures and stay informed with facts. Christopher F. Bolling is a pediatrician at Pediatric Associates, P.S.C. and an active board member at Beech Acres Parenting Center.

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Anxiety, Mindfullness, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips, Strengths

Prepare Your Children For Evacuation Drills At School By Discussing Their Strengths and Using Mindfulness

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Prepare Your Children For Evacuation Drills At School By Discussing Their Strengths and Using Mindfulness By Rich Richmond, Marketing Associate, Beech Acres Parenting Center Recently, during a quiet family dinner, my daughter was recounting her activities from that day and shared that they had an evacuation drill that morning. Without really thinking, I asked her what kind of drill, fire? Tornado? “Active shooter,” she replied. For generations, fire drills and tornado drills were a common activity for schoolchildren, a brief reprieve from the daily routine, and a valuable opportunity to remind them what to do in case a natural or unexpected disaster hit their school. For a new generation of children, another type of drill -the active shooter drill- has become just as commonplace. I was not as shocked as I expected, these drills are a common and unfortunately a necessary part of today’s school routine, but I was a bit surprised at how casual she was about it. Active shooter drills are as foreign to me as air raid or bomb drills were when my parents, grandparents or aunt and uncles would reference them. But for millions of kids, this is the new normal. Schools have a variety of terms for these types of drills; active shooter, intruder, ALICE (Alert, Lockdown, Inform, Counter, and Evacuate), for my daughter’s drill, a “suspicious character” was in the building. Her school is “L” shaped, and I was also surprised to hear that while one half of the school practiced an evacuation, the other half, where the “suspicious character” was located, practiced lockdown, hiding, and fighting back. It sparked a lot of conversation that night, and I am sure many other parents were in the same situation. Your children will likely experience these drills at some point, and it is important that you talk with them before, during, and after to make sure they can articulate their feelings and understand the importance of prioritizing their physical safety AND mental well-being. I consulted the experts I work with at Beech Acres Parenting Center to discuss some strategies to prepare kids for these types of drills. Here’s what they had to say: Before The Drill Your school will probably inform you of any upcoming drills. Make sure you stay current with any communications from the school, including emails, social media updates, and forms sent home with your child. Explain to your child that the drill will be happening and why it is important to take it seriously. Be careful not to interject any of your own anxieties or feelings into the conversations, your child will pick up on that and may mirror those feelings. Instead, create and maintain an atmosphere of openness and support, encouraging your child to share with you all aspects of their day, both positive and negative. You’re in this together! Let them know whatever they are feeling; fear, dread, confusion, indifference, is normal and be supportive. During The Drill Make sure your child understands the importance of paying attention during the drill and carefully following the directions they are given. Please encourage them to use mindfulness to help them get through it. The same simple strategies they use to calm themselves down before a big test or important game can work here. Tell them to be aware of their body and surroundings, listen to what is around them, be present in the moment. One exercise they can do before, during, or after) is the S.T.O.P. meditation; Stop what they are doing, Take a breath, Observe their surroundings, body, mind, and feelings, and Proceed with a clear mind. They can do this quickly, in the moment, as a way to calm down and focus during the drill. After The Drill Parenting experts have long espoused the importance of having dinner together as a family, and while that may not always be possible, being present in the moments you have with your child is. Make sure you take some time every day to really talk with your child, ask them powerful questions about their day that encourage more than one-word answers. Ask them how they felt physically, emotionally, and mentally after the drill. Discover, notice, build, and reward their strengths of bravery, judgment, perseverance, social intelligence, perspective, and hope. These strengths, along with mindfulness activities, can help your children build resiliency. As parents, we cannot protect our children from everything, but what we can do is teach them the tools and skills necessary to build their resiliency. Learn more about building your child’s strengths through Natural Strength Parenting, Beech Acres Parenting Center’s unique approach to parenting. If you want to go further, schedule a parent coaching session today.

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Anxiety, Mental Health, Natural Strength Parenting™

How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health; A Complete Guide For Parents

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How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health 1 in 5 children lives with a serious, diagnosable mental illness. 1 in 5. Think about your child’s friends, their class, and their school. That’s a lot of kids. It’s never been more important to be able to speak openly and honestly about mental health with your children. Fortunately, today’s parents are more open to discussing these important issues than previous generations. So, you’re open to discussing mental health with your child, but how do you do it? Where do you start? As with most essential topics, start at the beginning. Talk with your children about their feelings, focus on their strengths, and most importantly listen to what they have to say. Here are some tips from our parenting experts to get the conversation started at any age and to keep it going. Preschool It’s never too early to begin talking to your child about mental health. For your younger children, keep it simple and speak in terms and contexts that they will be able to understand. Preschool-age children are likely not just going to tell you how they feel, but they may express their feelings in a variety of ways. Look for their clues and engage them when you see them expressing different emotions. Use these clues as an opportunity for you to help them understand their feelings as they are first experiencing them and help them navigate their reactions to those emotions. What to ask. And what to say to your preschooler. What causes you to have butterflies in your stomach? This feeling of anxiety or nervousness is an easy one for children to recognize as it manifests itself physically. Help them identify what causes these feelings and help them cope with it by facing their feelings head-on. Where do your feelings come from? Helping your children understand where their feelings come from, how and why they react to certain experiences and stimuli, can help them begin to work out what to do with those emotions. Who can you talk to if your feelings get to be too much? Let your children know that you are there for them always. But also teach them to establish trust with other key adults in their lives. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, teachers, mentors, close friends, and doctors and therapists should be recognized as trusted people that they can turn to discuss their feelings. What are some ways you can calm down/relax/feel better/control your feelings? However, you phrase it, making sure that your children understand basic coping techniques at an early age is important. It may be quiet time in their room, a certain song or playlist, drawing or coloring, or even snuggling with mom or dad. Once your children know they have a way to deal with their feelings, they are starting to build resilience. Use media and daily experiences to normalize conversations about reacting to specific emotions. After watching a movie, TV show, or YouTube video together discuss how the characters interacted with each other and dealt with their feelings. Elementary School By the time your child is in elementary school, their personalities are well established, they’ve probably made some strong friendships and they are full of emotions. Often, these emotions will come as unexpected outbursts that may catch you off guard! That’s OK. They are learning to express their feelings, and you can be there to guide them. Linking their feelings and how they express them to their strengths is key at this age to identify and build their unique strengths and build resiliency. What to say to your kids when they are in elementary school. Make a feelings thermometer Kids at this age can understand things when they are presented to them visually. Giving them a way to express and understand how they are feeling visually can help them start to manage those emotions. Have your child interview others about their feelings and how they cope. Hopefully, while your child was younger, you helped them identify key adults (including yourself!) that they can talk to about their feelings. An interview with one of these trusted persons can help your child see that everyone deals with changing emotions and can give them insight into how others cope. Ask your child, “Is it okay to feel; sad, embarrassed, guilty, shame, happy, joy, lonely, anger?” Normalize their feelings. No matter what they are. Forget the notion that boys don’t cry and eliminate the concept of shame from your daughter’s vocabulary. All emotions are valid, and your child is going to feel ALL of the feels. Sometimes in the same day! Make sure they understand it is OK to not be OK all the time. And remind them that you are there for them. What does it feel like when you get nervous? Those butterflies in their stomach aren’t going to go anywhere anytime soon. As they get older, they may encounter more things that cause them to be nervous. New teachers, new school, new friends, new team, homework. Managing their nervousness and making sure it doesn’t explode into full-blown panic is a skill that they can continue to develop their entire lives. Who are three people are in can trust with your thoughts/ feelings? As they get older, your children may feel more comfortable discussing things with their friends. That’s fine, but make sure those relationships stay healthy and make sure to keep yourself in the loop. Narrowing down a circle of trusted people ensures them that they always have someone to talk to you. Junior High and High School   Teenagers. Am I right? You thought they could throw a tantrum when they were toddlers? That’s nothing to the depth of emotions you’ll see as they (hopefully) mature into young adults. Pre-teens, tweens, and teenagers are different from your younger kids as they are dealing with far greater and far more pressure than ever before. Mix in challenging physical changes and ever more complex relationships, and you’ll quickly find that discussing

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Anxiety, Mental Health, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips, Parents

How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health; Speaking To Your High Schooler

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How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health 1 in 5 children lives with a serious, diagnosable mental illness. 1 in 5. Think about your child’s friends, their class, their school. That’s a lot of kids. It’s never been more important to be able to speak openly and honestly about mental health with your children. Fortunately, today’s parents are more open to discussing these important issues that previous generations. So, you’re open to discussing mental health with your child, but how do you do it? Where do you start? As with most essential topics, start at the beginning. Talk with your children about their feelings, focus on their strengths, and, most importantly listen to what they have to say. Here are some tips from our parenting experts to start the conversation with your teen. Junior High and High School   Teenagers. Am I right? You thought they could throw a tantrum when they were toddlers? That’s nothing to the depth of emotions you’ll see as they (hopefully) mature into young adults. Pre-teens, tweens, and teenagers are different from your younger kids as they are dealing with far greater and far more pressure than ever before. Mix in challenging physical changes and ever more complex relationships, and you’ll quickly find that discussing mental health with your teenagers is critically important. With teen suicide at an all-time high, there has never been a better reason to talk, and listen to, your kids.  What to say to your kids as they sprint toward adulthood. Find creative ways other than talking to express their feelings. The bottom line is sometimes your teen is just not going to want to talk about how they are feeling. That can be OK on occasion as long as they have some way to express themselves. Encourage journaling, painting, music, drawing, dancing, anything artistic builds on their strength of creativity and can help them manage their emotions even when they don’t feel like talking. Ask questions when they are feeling fine. Mental health is just like physical health. Sometimes you feel good, and other times, not so much. Having conversations around their positive emotions and what makes them feel good, reinforces those good feelings, and helps prepare them to cope with the bad. Ask them questions that help you gauge their sadder emotions. Understanding if your child feels like they do not have a way to express their feelings, or don’t have someone to talk to is critical. Hopefully, when they were younger, you established key adults in their lives that they can go to. Ask them, “Do you ever feel completely alone?” or “Do you ever feel like no one understands you?” If the answer is yes, reinforce that you are there for them and reiterate everyone else in their lives that care for them as well. A mental health assessment may help you understand if a more therapeutic approach is necessary here. Talk to them about the stressors and pressures in their lives. Kids are busier now than ever. And the pressure they feel, whether it’s from you, a teacher or coach, or even themselves, is greater than ever. Stay involved. Talk to your children daily over dinner and understand what is going on in their lives. If homework, an after-school job, or college pressures are getting to be too much, intervene with coping methods to help them get back on track. A little mindfulness, some breathing exercises, yoga, or even just a walk outdoors can help ease their stress Monitor their media consumption. Look, you know your kid is staring at their phone all day every day. But do you know what they are staring at. This generation is growing up in a culture and with a comfort around technology that you probably don’t have. It can be hard to keep up. The reality is it’s far too easy for them to slip in a digital rabbit hole of inappropriate content, messaging that doesn’t align with your family’s values, and cyberbullying. Be aware of what they are doing online and be proactive. Ask if they know people who struggle with anxiety or depression and how they manage it? Be prepared for the answer to this question to be yes. Your child likely knows someone that is dealing with something. They may learn coping skills from their friends, but this is an opportunity to gain insight into how they are feeling about anxiety or depression. Listen to them and seek help if necessary. How long is it okay to be sad…. 1 minute, 1 hour, 1 day, 100 days? Trying to gauge your child understanding of sadness can open up a real conversation about mental health. Feelings should come and go. Again, like physical feelings, emotional feelings can be good and bad and can and should change with experiences and because of your environment. It’s when those not so great feeling emotions hang around for a little too long that you may need to be concerned. Talking with your children early, often, and continuously about their mental well-being is so essential. Share these tips with fellow parents and let us know which strategies worked best for your family. Check out our complete guide to talking to your child about mental health at any age. Learn more about discussing mental health with your preschooler. Learn more about discussing mental health with your child in elementary school. Learn more about discussing mental health with your teens and high schoolers. Looking to go further? Check out Natural Strength Parenting To Go! These text-based courses from our parenting experts help you get the most out of Natural Strength Parenting™ with easy-to-implement parenting strategies. Get started today!

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Anxiety, Back To School, Mental Health, Natural Strength Parenting™

How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health; Tips For Speaking With Your Child In Elementary School

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How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health 1 in 5 children lives with a serious, diagnosable mental illness. 1 in 5. Think about your child’s friends, their class, their school. That’s a lot of kids. It’s never been more important to be able to speak openly and honestly about mental health with your children. Fortunately, today’s parents are more open to discussing these important issues that previous generations. So, you’re open to discussing mental health with your child, but how do you do it? Where do you start? As with most essential topics, start at the beginning. Talk with your children about their feelings, focus on their strengths, and most importantly listen to what they have to say. Here are some tips from our parenting experts to get the conversation started with your child in elementary school. We also shared how to talk to your preschooler and we’ll help you keep the conversation going with tips on speaking to your child into junior high and high school. Elementary School By the time your child is in elementary school, their personalities are well established, they’ve probably made some strong friendships and they are full of emotions. Often, these emotions will come as unexpected outbursts that may catch you off guard! That’s OK. They are learning to express their feelings, and you can be there to guide them. Linking their feelings and how they express them to their strengths is key at this age to identify and build their unique strengths and build resiliency. What to say to your kids when they are in elementary school. Make a feelings thermometerhttps://copingskillsforkids.com/blog/2016/4/27/making-a-feelings-thermometer Kids at this age can understand things when they are presented to them visually. Giving them a way to express and understand how they are feeling visually can help them start to manage those emotions. Have your child interview others about their feelings and how they cope. Hopefully, while your child was younger, you helped them identify key adults (including yourself!) that they can talk to about their feelings. An interview with one of these trusted persons can help your child see that everyone deals with changing emotions and can give them insight into how others cope. Ask your child, “Is it okay to feel; sad, embarrassed, guilty, shame, happy, joy, lonely, anger?” Normalize their feelings. No matter what they are. Forget the notion that boys don’t cry and eliminate the concept of shame from your daughter’s vocabulary. All emotions are valid, and your child is going to feel ALL of the feels. Sometimes in the same day! Make sure they understand it is OK to not be OK all the time. And remind them that you are there for them. What does it feel like when you get nervous? Those butterflies in their stomach aren’t going to go anywhere anytime soon. As they get older, they may encounter more things that cause them to be nervous. New teachers, new school, new friends, new team, homework. Managing their nervousness and making sure it doesn’t explode into full-blown panic is a skill that they can continue to develop their entire lives. Who are three people are in can trust with your thoughts/ feelings? As they get older, your children may feel more comfortable discussing things with their friends. That’s fine, but make sure those relationships stay healthy and make sure to keep yourself in the loop. Narrowing down a circle of trusted people ensures them that they always have someone to talk to you. Talking with your children early, often, and continuously about their mental well-being is so essential. Share these tips with fellow parents and let us know which strategies worked best for your family. Check out our complete guide to talking to your child about mental health at any age. Learn more about discussing mental health with your preschooler. Learn more about discussing mental health with your child in elementary school. Learn more about discussing mental health with your teens and high schoolers. Looking to go further? Check out Natural Strength Parenting To Go! These text-based courses from our parenting experts help you get the most out of Natural Strength Parenting™ with easy to implement parenting strategies. Get started today!

Photo of a little girl reading with father on the couch
Anxiety, Back To School, Mental Health, Natural Strength Parenting™, Parenting Tips, Parents

How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health; Tips For Talking To Your Preschooler

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How To Talk To Your Kids About Mental Health 1 in 5 children lives with a serious, diagnosable mental illness. 1 in 5. Think about your child’s friends, their class, their school. That’s a lot of kids. It’s never been more important to be able to speak openly and honestly about mental health with your children. Fortunately, today’s parents are more open to discussing these important issues that previous generations. So, you’re open to discussing mental health with your child, but how do you do it? Where do you start? As with most essential topics, start at the beginning. Talk with your children about their feelings, focus on their strengths, and most importantly listen to what they have to say. Here are some tips from our parenting experts to get the conversation started with your preschooler. We’ll also share how to keep the conversation going with tips on speaking to your child in elementary school and into junior high and high school. Preschool It’s never too early to begin talking to your child about mental health. For your younger children, keep it simple and speak in terms and contexts that they will be able to understand. Preschool-age children are likely not just going to tell you how they feel, but they may express their feelings in a variety of ways. Look for their clues and engage them when you see them expressing different emotions. Use these clues as an opportunity for you to help them understand their feelings as they are first experiencing them and help them navigate their reactions to those emotions. What to ask. And what to say to your preschooler. What causes you to have butterflies in your stomach? This feeling of anxiety or nervousness is an easy one for children to recognize as it manifests itself physically. Help them identify what causes these feelings and help them cope with it by facing their feelings head-on. Where do your feelings come from? Helping your children understand where their feelings come from, how and why they react to certain experiences and stimuli, can help them begin to work out what to do with those emotions. Who can you talk to if your feelings get to be too much? Let your children know that you are there for them always. But also teach them to establish trust with other key adults in their lives. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, teachers, mentors, close friends, and doctors and therapists should be recognized as trusted people that they can turn to discuss their feelings. What are some ways you can calm down/relax/feel better/control your feelings? However, you phrase it, making sure that your children understand basic coping techniques at an early age is important. It may be quiet time in their room, a certain song or playlist, drawing or coloring, or even snuggling with mom or dad. Once your children know they have a way to deal with their feelings, they are starting to build resilience. Use media and daily experiences to normalize conversations about reacting to specific emotions. After watching a movie, TV show, or YouTube video together discuss how the characters interacted with each other and dealt with their feelings. Talking with your children early, often, and continuously about their mental well-being is so essential. Share these tips with fellow parents and let us know which strategies worked best for your family. Check out our complete guide to talking to your child about mental health at any age. Learn more about discussing mental health with your preschooler. Learn more about discussing mental health with your child in elementary school. Learn more about discussing mental health with your teens and high schoolers. Looking to go further? Check out Natural Strength Parenting To Go! These text-based courses from our parenting experts help you get the most out of Natural Strength Parenting™ with easy-to-implement parenting strategies. Get started today!

Photo of three bottles filled with liquid and various amounts of confetti
Anxiety, Mindfullness

Create a Calming Canteen and Feel the Benefits of Mindfulness

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This fun activity can help ease your child’s anxiety.  Gather Your Materials Clean, clear plastic water bottle 1 tablespoon of glitter food coloring (optional) Water Super glue or hot glue gun Make Your Canteen With your family, take a clean Plastic Bottle and squeeze a small amount of Glue into the bottle (1-2 squeezes, about the size of a quarter). Now add about 1 tablespoon of Glitter to the bottle. If you would like to add a pop of color, add 2-3 drops of Food Coloring. Fill your canteen with Water. Now you are ready to Super Glue or hot glue the top on the bottle to ensure the lid stays on tight. Parents, make sure you supervise use of hot glue gun! Practice Mindfulness Shake your Calming Canteen for 20-30 seconds. Notice how cloudy it is and how you can no longer see through to the other side. This is how your mind looks when you are upset, overwhelmed or on emotional overdrive. When our mind feels like this we have a hard time focusing, making good decisions and interacting with others. Take three deep breaths. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. As you take these deep breaths notice the glitter starting to settle, along with your own mind. Notice how all the glitter has settled and the water is clear again. Do you feel calmer? Is your mind less cloudy? How might you use this activity at home?

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